Things I wouldn’t miss if I stopped cycling.
- The difficult in walking down stairs after a particularly long training ride. I’ve sometimes wondered if it wouldn’t be easier just to slide down on my backside, and only slightly less dignified. Or perhaps the way forward is the ‘Stena stairlift for cyclists’.
- The difficulty I get from trying to stand up for any prolonged period of time, leading to that strong desire to find a seat at all costs. I would never make an Edwardian gentleman standing up for people on the train – I’m a cyclist, give me a seat!
- Shaving the back of legs with epilator, especially for first time of the season. It’s a strange, unpleasant sensation. I suppose the Gestapo had worse torture methods, but it’s the fact you have to do it yourself – you’re always caught between going quickly to get it over, and taking ages to slightly minimise the pain. You could just shave, but then you have to do it again in two days.
- That feeling of getting on the saddle when you already have a painful saddle sore.
- The reluctance to join in a friendly game of football with your mates for fear it may compromise your cycling legs for the next day. Running and cycling don’t mix (triathletes excepted)
- The flatulence arising from excessive consumption of whey protein recovery shakes.
- Never having to worry about spending £XXXX to save 100 grams of weight or some marginal aero benefit. My bank balance would so much be healthier.
- That moment of helplessness as a 7 tonne lorry passing you on a single carriageway with a foot to spare.
- Not being too depressed when the long range weather forecast offers another 7 days of rain.
- Somebody mentions a spectacular event on March 31st of next year, and you immediately start worrying whether it will conflict with a classic cycle race.
- Not opening a cycling magazine and seeing that all the new equipment you’ve just bought is already ‘obsolete’ only 1 month after purchase.
- Never having to explain why actually I won’t be riding the Tour de France, just because I won the ‘Wobbly wheelers’ 10 mile TT.
- Never having to vainly smile, when non-cyclists think it’s funny to ask what drugs you are taking.
- That feeling of feeling your power evaporate from your legs, and knowing you’ve still got another 1 or 2 hours to race!
- Those monumental headwinds during winter training, where your average speed falls to 14mph
- Cold Feet, cold hands! for six hour winter training rides.
- The inability to run for a train – because it will be bad for my cycling muscles.
- Road rash from the inevitable crashes.
Related
Cyclists method of going downstairs –>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twyBG1Tq_8o
Bungalows are great,no stairs,but bum/legs still sore after a long hard ride.
cannot find nice easy flat rides here in Pudsey leeds.
sm – you got there first with most other points!
- time spent/waisted on cycling retailer’s websites when I know there’s nothing I really need
- buying a 10-pack of spare inner tubes, just in case the price goes up…
- listen out for the kids before applying chamois cream
- barely making it back home after a wet cold ride with several punctures, egged on by the knowledge of that leftover bowl of your favourite food in the fridge, sadly consumed by your youngest who’d been missing your cooking skills for the last six hours.
- watching a race live on TV for hours, only to insist to watch the highlights as well when the whole family is assembled
and admit it, we’re only being VERY selective with our lists.
Great post Tejvan, brought a smile to my lips with the walking down the stairs part – although I quite enjoy the pain – tells me the training ride was a good one!
For me:
- Applying chamois cream. You know it.
- Walking around in cleats
- Padded shorts
- Fixing punctures with freezing cold hands
- That feeling, that knowing feeling, when your front wheel slides out from beneath you
- Pretending to be a mechanic and spending many a frustrated hour before taking bike to LBS anyway!
- Winter. Full stop.
- Trying to force food down my throat at 5am for an early ride
- Getting up at 5am
- Taking it easy/quitting the booze before big rides
- Finding yourself on dual carriageway
- Approaching a four lane traffic Island that connects motorways/dual carriageways with that tiny lany you need to turn off at, fourth exit around
- The bonk
- Any kind of noise on the bike
Hmm, you do wonder sometimes – must be one hell of a “why I love cycling list!”
Nice list, sm. There all points I can empathise with!
you might like
http://cyclinginfo.co.uk/blog/4986/articles/confessions-of-an-amateur-bike-mechanic/
I see you’ve already commented on that repair article!